5 Things No One Ever Told You About Bringing Home a Newborn Baby

From the moment I became a big sister, I couldn’t wait to be an adult and have children of my own. When my ex and I decided it was finally THE time, I was beyond excited. But there are things I wish I had known before I brought my newborn at home. These could seem obvious to you, but maybe others need to know this because, like me, no one has told them that.

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Newborn babies drink every 2 or 3 HOURS, day and night…

… and even more, if you are lucky enough to breastfeed (sometimes, every 30 minutes). I am not kidding, I had NO IDEA. My best friend had 2 kids by the time I gave birth to my daughter Mary. Since I had a Caesarean section for her, we spent about 4 days at the hospital. So at night, I was either woken up by a nurse checking on me, or my newborn crying. I had just assumed that the surrounding noises were waking up Mary.

What’s wrong with my baby?!

Fast forward to a week after we got home. My ex and I were splitting the night shifts, but we were both wondering why in the world Mary needed to be fed at night. Little lady, you should be asleep! We LEGITIMATELY thought our baby was broken! She needed to sleep at night, so the fact that she was hungry probably meant we were doing something wrong.

NOPE! So I am telling you what no one told me: NEWBORN BABIES DRINK EVERY 2-3 HOURS, DAY AND NIGHT. Why else would parents complain that they haven’t slept in 18 months?!

To be fully prepared, I recommend you read this book about motherhood. I wish I had read it prior to having my first child. I would have avoided a lot of anxiety.

That brings me to the second point.

Don’t take anything for granted, especially when it comes to sleep

This one comes from my lovely friend Carole-Ann, who has 2 kids under 2 years old right now. Do you think your baby is finally sleeping through the night? Great success! But don’t take it for granted. It’s not because they have been sleeping for 6+ hours at night for the past few days that they won’t wake up 30 times tonight. Sleep regression is (unfortunately) a real thing.

For at least the first few years of parenting, you WILL lack sleep. Badly. Know that IT’S OKAY TO ASK FOR HELP. When I had my daughter, my mom took her for the night once a week. The first time, Mary was only 2 weeks old. Still a newborn. No jokes, I cried for 8 hours straight because I felt like I had abandoned my child. Trust me, the weeks after, I left my daughter with my mom and almost literally ran back to my car to go to bed.

Check out this book that gets real and raw about motherhood. Sometimes, when things are difficult, laughing about it can help relieve some pressure and give you hope that it will get better.

So if you are looking for the world’s best gift for parents of a newborn, offer them to babysit the baby while they go take a nap. Caro did it for me once with my son, and to this day, I still think that’s the kindest thing anyone has ever done to me.

Teething lasts longer than you think

This point is also from Caro. You may think it lasts about 48 hours each time. Think again: it feels like 50 years. Your kid will be cranky (think about it… bones are coming out of their gums! Do you remember the feeling when your wisdom teeth started showing up?)

My recommendation? Buckle up, but you got this! You will need a lot of patience. Some parents like to use over-the-counter remedies, some others prefer homeopathic products. But other than Tylenol and Advil to help soothe the pain, I recommend buy teething toys that are made to be frozen, or simply rub their gums with your finger (obviously, wash your hands before).

I got myself a teething necklace, and it saved me a lot for my son (I didn’t have one for my daughter). I highly recommend teething necklaces. Why? Your baby will basically only feel good in your arms; you might as well be fashionable about it!

You have to work on their fine motor skills

This one took me by surprise when my daughter started kindergarten last September. I had no idea that her dexterity and fine motor skills were behind for kids her age (5-6 years old). I did do some work with her as a baby as her pediatrician told me, but I got back to work when she was 4 months old, and her dad went back to school when she was 6 months, so she started going to daycare. I kind of assumed that they had a program for that, and never really paid attention to her fine motor skills.

That being said, I did do some activities with my kids. I really like the Montessori method. For instance, when my kids were about 8-9 months old, I took their crib mattress and put it on the floor, on puzzle mats, to let them discover the world (read: their very secure bedroom) as soon as they woke up (and let me drink my coffee). I couldn’t find/remember the exact article that inspired me to do this, but I found that one. If you prefer reading books, check out this one: Montessori from the start.

One of the baby toys (3m+) I liked the most was the discovery cube (see image/link below). It has many different textures, so your baby can experiment and develop fine motor skills early. As they grow up, you can move on to discovery boards like this one.

For inspiration, check out my Pinterest board named Kids activities!

It is OKAY to ask for help

Before I left the hospital with my newborn daughter, my ex and I had a brief training about the Shaken baby syndrome. To me, OBVIOUSLY, I was never going to shake my baby. But the nurse who was talking us through the training told us that some parents lose it because of the lack of sleep, which drives them crazy when the baby is crying for seemingly no reason.

If you feel like you are about to lose it, put your baby in their crib. They may be crying their heart out, but when you are losing control, your baby is safer in their crib than in your arms. Then, go take a deep breath outside. Do you need 5 minutes to calm down and breathe? It’s okay. As long as you regain control of your emotions.

Also, when you can’t take this anymore, call someone. You don’t even have to get out of the house: ask someone worthy of trust to babysit your newborn in your own home while you rest in your bed. Or maybe ask your parents to babysit the baby for the night, go out with friends, and sleep late in the morning.

Parenting is hard, way harder than I expected (my ex and I wanted to have 4 children, we stopped after 2, and I got a tubal ligation to make sure I didn’t change my mind). But you will be okay. Never hesitate to reach out for help from a trustworthy person around you. And keep your head high: you just created a mini human! Enjoy every single moment <3

Share this article with your friends to help them get prepared to have a baby… The ups and downs!